{"id":1722,"date":"2026-10-10T21:39:49","date_gmt":"2026-10-10T12:39:49","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/nehan.life\/en\/?p=1722"},"modified":"2026-10-10T21:39:49","modified_gmt":"2026-10-10T12:39:49","slug":"why-is-my-self-esteem-low","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/nehan.life\/en\/why-is-my-self-esteem-low\/","title":{"rendered":"Why Is My Self-Esteem So Low? What It Means, Three Things You Can Start Today, and How to Choose Help If You Keep Slipping Back"},"content":{"rendered":"<style>@import url('https:\/\/fonts.googleapis.com\/css2?family=Zen+Old+Mincho:wght@400;500;600;700&display=swap'); .nh-body{color:#3a352e;line-height:2.0;font-family:\"Zen Old Mincho\",\"Yu Mincho\",\"Hiragino Mincho ProN\",\"Yu Mincho\",serif;font-weight:400} .nh-body p{margin:0 0 22px}.nh-body strong{font-weight:600;background:linear-gradient(transparent 62%,#D8E4CF 62%);padding:0 1px} .nh-body h2{scroll-margin-top:80px;font-family:\"Zen Old Mincho\",serif;font-size:23px;font-weight:600;color:#2c2922;letter-spacing:.04em;line-height:1.6;margin:66px 0 26px;padding:6px 0 16px 18px;border-left:4px solid #52684A;border-bottom:1px solid #E7DECE} .nh-body h3{scroll-margin-top:80px;font-family:\"Zen Old Mincho\",serif;font-size:18px;font-weight:600;color:#52684A;letter-spacing:.03em;margin:40px 0 14px;padding-left:13px;border-left:2px solid #C9B79C} 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Neue\",Arial,sans-serif;font-size:12px;letter-spacing:.3em;font-weight:600;color:#52684A;margin:0 0 12px} .nh-lead ul.nh-check{margin:0}.nh-lead .nh-check li{padding:8px 8px 8px 34px;font-size:15px}.nh-lead .nh-check li:last-child{border-bottom:0} .nh-cta--mid{margin:44px auto 48px;padding:34px 30px 30px;max-width:560px} .nh-cta--mid .nh-cta__title{font-size:18px;margin-bottom:10px} .nh-cta--mid .nh-cta__lead{font-size:13px;line-height:1.9;margin-bottom:20px} .nh-cta--mid .nh-cta__rule{height:20px;margin-bottom:20px} .nh-cta--mid .nh-cta__note{display:none} @media (max-width:480px){.nh-cta--mid{margin:34px auto 38px;padding:26px 16px 24px}} .nh-toc{background:#FAF7F2;border:1px solid #E7DECE;border-radius:2px;padding:26px 28px 22px;margin:40px 0 48px} .nh-toc__label{font-family:\"Avenir\",\"Avenir Next\",\"Helvetica Neue\",Arial,sans-serif;font-size:11px;letter-spacing:.18em;color:#52684A;margin:0 0 14px;font-weight:600} .nh-toc__list{list-style:none;margin:0;padding:0;counter-reset:nhtoc} .nh-toc__list>li{counter-increment:nhtoc;margin:0 0 10px;padding-left:26px;position:relative;line-height:1.7} .nh-toc__list>li:before{content:counter(nhtoc,decimal-leading-zero);position:absolute;left:0;top:1px;font-family:\"Avenir\",\"Avenir Next\",\"Helvetica Neue\",Arial,sans-serif;font-size:11px;color:#C9B79C;letter-spacing:.06em} .nh-toc a{color:#3a352e;text-decoration:none;border-bottom:1px solid transparent} .nh-toc a:hover{color:#52684A;border-bottom-color:#C9B79C} .nh-toc__sub{list-style:none;margin:8px 0 0;padding:0} .nh-toc__sub>li{margin:0 0 6px;padding-left:14px;position:relative;font-size:14px;line-height:1.65} .nh-toc__sub>li:before{content:\"\\2014\";position:absolute;left:0;color:#C9B79C} @media (max-width:600px){.nh-toc{padding:20px 18px 16px;margin:32px 0 38px}}<\/style>\n<div class=\"nh-body\">\n<nav class=\"nh-toc\" aria-label=\"CONTENTS\">\n<p class=\"nh-toc__label\">CONTENTS<\/p>\n<ul class=\"nh-toc__list\">\n<li><a href=\"#nh-s1\">Key points<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"#nh-s2\">How is self-esteem different from confidence or self-efficacy?<\/a>\n<ul class=\"nh-toc__sub\">\n<li><a href=\"#nh-s2-1\">What&#8217;s the difference between confidence, self-efficacy, and self-esteem?<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"#nh-s2-2\">Does the standard self-esteem scale measure achievement?<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n<li><a href=\"#nh-s3\">Why does my self-esteem stay low?<\/a>\n<ul class=\"nh-toc__sub\">\n<li><a href=\"#nh-s3-1\">Is low self-esteem a personality flaw?<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"#nh-s3-2\">Is it just me, or is this common?<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"#nh-s3-3\">What does self-compassion have to do with it?<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n<li><a href=\"#nh-s4\">What can I do today to build self-esteem?<\/a>\n<ul class=\"nh-toc__sub\">\n<li><a href=\"#nh-s4-1\">What are the three things to start with?<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"#nh-s4-2\">Why not fix the harsh words, and what&#8217;s the point of scheduling rest?<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n<li><a href=\"#nh-s5\">Why don&#8217;t positive affirmations work for me?<\/a>\n<ul class=\"nh-toc__sub\">\n<li><a href=\"#nh-s5-1\">Can positive self-talk actually make things worse?<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"#nh-s5-2\">What order makes affirmations less likely to backfire?<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n<li><a href=\"#nh-s6\">What&#8217;s the difference between doing it alone, seeing a professional, and joining a program?<\/a>\n<ul class=\"nh-toc__sub\">\n<li><a href=\"#nh-s6-1\">Who is each option suited to?<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"#nh-s6-2\">How much time does each take, and how easy is it to slip back?<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"#nh-s6-3\">How do I check that each option is safe?<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n<li><a href=\"#nh-s7\">I try on my own but slip right back. What should I do?<\/a>\n<ul class=\"nh-toc__sub\">\n<li><a href=\"#nh-s7-1\">Why do I keep returning to the same place?<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"#nh-s7-2\">When is a retreat worth considering?<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n<li><a href=\"#nh-s8\">Is it okay to leave daily life for three days right away? Who shouldn&#8217;t?<\/a>\n<ul class=\"nh-toc__sub\">\n<li><a href=\"#nh-s8-1\">What order makes sense?<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"#nh-s8-2\">Who should talk to a doctor first?<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n<li><a href=\"#nh-s9\">FAQ<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/nav>\n<h2 id=\"nh-s1\">Key points<\/h2>\n<ul class=\"nh-check\">\n<li>Self-esteem is the baseline sense that &#8220;even when I&#8217;m not doing well, I&#8217;m allowed to be here.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>When it&#8217;s low, that&#8217;s usually not a personality defect. It&#8217;s often the result of years of conditional experience: &#8220;I&#8217;ll be accepted *if* I manage this.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>To rebuild it, don&#8217;t start by talking yourself into it. Write things down, rest, try something small \u2014 in that order.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Self-esteem is the sense that, even on a day when nothing works out, you still belong where you are. Caring what people think of you isn&#8217;t a flaw in your character.<\/p>\n<p>More often it&#8217;s a habit grown from conditional approval \u2014 &#8220;we&#8217;ll acknowledge you once you&#8217;ve managed it.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>You probably know the feeling: your manager says &#8220;Got a second?&#8221; and your chest tightens before you&#8217;ve even stood up. That&#8217;s a trace of the same habit.<\/p>\n<p>And a habit, unlike a personality, can be loosened a little at a time.<\/p>\n<h2 id=\"nh-s2\">How is self-esteem different from confidence or self-efficacy?<\/h2>\n<h3 id=\"nh-s2-1\">What&#8217;s the difference between confidence, self-efficacy, and self-esteem?<\/h3>\n<p>Confidence says &#8220;I can do this.&#8221; Self-efficacy says &#8220;I could probably manage this.&#8221; Self-esteem says &#8220;Even if I can&#8217;t, I still have worth.&#8221; It&#8217;s the ground the other two stand on.<\/p>\n<p>The first two rise and fall with events. Nail the presentation and confidence goes up; blow it and confidence drops. Self-esteem is different precisely because it&#8217;s less likely to move with the day&#8217;s results.<\/p>\n<p>That&#8217;s the whole distinction, and it matters for everything that follows.<\/p>\n<h3 id=\"nh-s2-2\">Does the standard self-esteem scale measure achievement?<\/h3>\n<p>The scale most often used to measure self-esteem, Rosenberg (1965), asks about unconditional self-evaluation \u2014 statements like &#8220;I feel that I have worth.&#8221; It doesn&#8217;t ask what you accomplished.<\/p>\n<p>Self-esteem simply isn&#8217;t an indicator of results.<\/p>\n<div class=\"nh-quote\">Self-esteem isn&#8217;t about your grade. It&#8217;s about your seat. You can fail at work and still have a chair to sit in when you get home. The chair was there from the start. You&#8217;ve just stopped being able to believe it is.<\/div>\n<h2 id=\"nh-s3\">Why does my self-esteem stay low?<\/h2>\n<h3 id=\"nh-s3-1\">Is low self-esteem a personality flaw?<\/h3>\n<figure class=\"nh-article-image\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/nehan.life\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/10\/jiko-koteikan-hikui-naze-img-1.png\" alt=\"\u81ea\u5df1\u80af\u5b9a\u611f\u304c\u4f4e\u3044\u306e\u306f\u306a\u305c\uff1f\u610f\u5473\u3068\u3001\u4eca\u65e5\u304b\u3089\u3067\u304d\u308b3\u3064\u306e\u3053\u3068\u30fb\u4e00\u4eba\u3067\u623b\u308b\u4eba\u306e\u9078\u3073\u65b9 \u306e\u30a4\u30e1\u30fc\u30b8 1\" loading=\"lazy\"><\/figure>\n<p>Usually not. More often it&#8217;s what happens after a long stretch of conditional approval. Score 90 and you&#8217;re praised; score 70 and the room goes quiet.<\/p>\n<p>Live that way for years and you learn, without anyone saying it out loud, that worth equals results.<\/p>\n<p>Nobody decides to believe this. It&#8217;s absorbed, the way you absorb which streets to avoid on the way home. That&#8217;s why telling yourself &#8220;I&#8217;m fine as I am&#8221; rarely lands \u2014 the lesson wasn&#8217;t learned through words.<\/p>\n<h3 id=\"nh-s3-2\">Is it just me, or is this common?<\/h3>\n<p>It isn&#8217;t just you. A Japanese Cabinet Office survey (fiscal 2018) found that the proportion of young people in Japan who say they&#8217;re satisfied with themselves is lower than in several other countries. This is not an individual defect.<\/p>\n<p>A lot of people walk around convinced that they alone are the broken one. If that&#8217;s you, it may help to know how crowded that particular room is.<\/p>\n<h3 id=\"nh-s3-3\">What does self-compassion have to do with it?<\/h3>\n<p>Neff (2003) proposed that kindness toward oneself \u2014 self-compassion \u2014 is associated with a form of self-evaluation that doesn&#8217;t swing so much with comparison to others.<\/p>\n<p>In other words, the foundation isn&#8217;t a higher score. It&#8217;s how you treat yourself when the score is low.<\/p>\n<p>This is the shift the rest of the article builds on. Not &#8220;do better so you can approve of yourself,&#8221; but &#8220;change how you handle yourself on the days you don&#8217;t.&#8221;<\/p>\n<h2 id=\"nh-s4\">What can I do today to build self-esteem?<\/h2>\n<h3 id=\"nh-s4-1\">What are the three things to start with?<\/h3>\n<p>There are three. The order matters, and talking yourself into anything comes last.<\/p>\n<ul class=\"nh-check\">\n<li>Write down the exact words you used against yourself (&#8220;I messed up again&#8221; \u2014 don&#8217;t edit it).<\/li>\n<li>Put &#8220;rest after effort&#8221; on your schedule *before* you know the result, not after.<\/li>\n<li>Try one small thing where failing wouldn&#8217;t matter. Walking into a bakery you&#8217;ve never been to is enough.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>None of these require you to feel better first. That&#8217;s the point.<\/p>\n<h3 id=\"nh-s4-2\">Why not fix the harsh words, and what&#8217;s the point of scheduling rest?<\/h3>\n<figure class=\"nh-article-image\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/nehan.life\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/10\/jiko-koteikan-hikui-naze-img-2.png\" alt=\"\u81ea\u5df1\u80af\u5b9a\u611f\u304c\u4f4e\u3044\u306e\u306f\u306a\u305c\uff1f\u610f\u5473\u3068\u3001\u4eca\u65e5\u304b\u3089\u3067\u304d\u308b3\u3064\u306e\u3053\u3068\u30fb\u4e00\u4eba\u3067\u623b\u308b\u4eba\u306e\u9078\u3073\u65b9 \u306e\u30a4\u30e1\u30fc\u30b8 2\" loading=\"lazy\"><\/figure>\n<p>The first step depends on *not* correcting what you wrote. The moment you rewrite &#8220;I messed up again&#8221; into something kinder, the honest version retreats back inside. Let it sit on the page as it is.<\/p>\n<p>The second step is practice at removing a condition most of us carry: &#8220;I haven&#8217;t earned a rest until there&#8217;s a result.&#8221; Putting rest on the calendar in advance quietly challenges that rule.<\/p>\n<p>One small trick: in the margin of your note, add what your body is doing \u2014 &#8220;shoulders are up,&#8221; &#8220;breathing is shallow.&#8221; And if you stop halfway through the week, you haven&#8217;t failed. You just come back.<\/p>\n<div class=\"nh-cta nh-cta--mid\">\n<p class=\"nh-cta__eyebrow\">FREE PROGRAM<\/p>\n<p class=\"nh-cta__title\">A doorway to seeing your life anew \u2014 through the body<\/p>\n<p class=\"nh-cta__lead\">Add us on LINE to receive the free online lessons \u2014 the parts we couldn&#8217;t fit into this article.<\/p>\n<div class=\"nh-cta__rule\"><\/div>\n<p>  <a class=\"nh-cta__btn\" href=\"https:\/\/om.nehan.life\/line\/open\/XOyz4TM3QCnV\" style=\"color:#fff !important;text-decoration:none\"><span class=\"label\" style=\"color:#fff !important\">Get the free lessons on LINE<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n<p class=\"nh-cta__note\">Free to join, unsubscribe anytime. This is not medical treatment; results vary by individual.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<h2 id=\"nh-s5\">Why don&#8217;t positive affirmations work for me?<\/h2>\n<h3 id=\"nh-s5-1\">Can positive self-talk actually make things worse?<\/h3>\n<p>It&#8217;s not necessarily that you&#8217;re doing it wrong. Wood et al. (2009) reported that when people with low self-evaluation repeated positive self-statements such as &#8220;I am a worthy person,&#8221; their mood sometimes got *worse*, not better.<\/p>\n<p>The likely reason is distance. The wider the gap between the words and what you actually feel, the more the mind pushes back. Telling yourself you&#8217;re worthy while your shoulders say otherwise can land as one more thing you&#8217;ve failed at.<\/p>\n<h3 id=\"nh-s5-2\">What order makes affirmations less likely to backfire?<\/h3>\n<p>Write down the harsh words first. Notice what your body is doing. Rest. Only once things have loosened a little do words have somewhere to land \u2014 and the pushback tends to be smaller.<\/p>\n<p>If you&#8217;ve already tried affirmations and felt nothing, or felt worse, that&#8217;s not evidence against you. We&#8217;ve written more in <a href=\"https:\/\/nehan.life\/blog\/affirmation-imi-nai\/\">For people who felt affirmations were pointless<\/a> and <a href=\"https:\/\/nehan.life\/blog\/jibun-migaki-imi-nai\/\">For people whose self-improvement went nowhere<\/a>.<\/p>\n<h2 id=\"nh-s6\">What&#8217;s the difference between doing it alone, seeing a professional, and joining a program?<\/h2>\n<figure class=\"nh-article-image\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/nehan.life\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/10\/jiko-koteikan-hikui-naze-img-3.png\" alt=\"\u81ea\u5df1\u80af\u5b9a\u611f\u304c\u4f4e\u3044\u306e\u306f\u306a\u305c\uff1f\u610f\u5473\u3068\u3001\u4eca\u65e5\u304b\u3089\u3067\u304d\u308b3\u3064\u306e\u3053\u3068\u30fb\u4e00\u4eba\u3067\u623b\u308b\u4eba\u306e\u9078\u3073\u65b9 \u306e\u30a4\u30e1\u30fc\u30b8 3\" loading=\"lazy\"><\/figure>\n<h3 id=\"nh-s6-1\">Who is each option suited to?<\/h3>\n<p>None of these ranks above the others. You choose based on where you are right now.<\/p>\n<p>Doing it yourself suits people who can experiment a little each day inside ordinary life. Working with a professional \u2014 counseling or similar \u2014 suits people whose anxiety is strong, who are already under medical care, or who feel unsafe facing this alone.<\/p>\n<p>Joining a program, such as a course or a structured retreat, suits people who have tried on their own for several weeks and keep sliding back.<\/p>\n<h3 id=\"nh-s6-2\">How much time does each take, and how easy is it to slip back?<\/h3>\n<p>On your own, think a few minutes a day for several weeks or more. With a professional, regular sessions over months. In a program, a few concentrated days plus a period after you return.<\/p>\n<p>Slipping back looks different in each. Alone, your environment is unchanged, so old reactions return easily. With a professional, there&#8217;s a structure that helps you keep going.<\/p>\n<p>In a program, the difference lies in whether there&#8217;s a system for carrying things home \u2014 without one, the effect can fade fast.<\/p>\n<h3 id=\"nh-s6-3\">How do I check that each option is safe?<\/h3>\n<p>On your own: rest on the days you can&#8217;t. With a professional: check qualifications and confidentiality. With a program: look at the organizer&#8217;s background, whether you can stop partway through, and what follow-up exists.<\/p>\n<p>Doing it yourself looks unglamorous. But the people who skip this stage are the ones most likely to slip back. Try two weeks first.<\/p>\n<h2 id=\"nh-s7\">I try on my own but slip right back. What should I do?<\/h2>\n<h3 id=\"nh-s7-1\">Why do I keep returning to the same place?<\/h3>\n<figure class=\"nh-article-image\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/nehan.life\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/10\/jiko-koteikan-hikui-naze-img-4.png\" alt=\"\u81ea\u5df1\u80af\u5b9a\u611f\u304c\u4f4e\u3044\u306e\u306f\u306a\u305c\uff1f\u610f\u5473\u3068\u3001\u4eca\u65e5\u304b\u3089\u3067\u304d\u308b3\u3064\u306e\u3053\u3068\u30fb\u4e00\u4eba\u3067\u623b\u308b\u4eba\u306e\u9078\u3073\u65b9 \u306e\u30a4\u30e1\u30fc\u30b8 4\" loading=\"lazy\"><\/figure>\n<p>Slipping back isn&#8217;t weak will. Inside daily life, the same triggers tend to produce the same reactions.<\/p>\n<div class=\"nh-walls\">\n<div class=\"nh-wall\">\n<p class=\"nh-wall__t\">Same trigger, same reaction<\/p>\n<p>Same office, same family, same commuter train: learned responses fire automatically.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<div class=\"nh-wall\">\n<p class=\"nh-wall__t\">Working on it only in your head<\/p>\n<p>You can understand something and still have a body that stays braced. Felt sense rarely rewrites itself through thought alone.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<div class=\"nh-wall\">\n<p class=\"nh-wall__t\">Trying too hard to &#8220;solve&#8221; it<\/p>\n<p>The effort to change can quietly reinforce the premise that who you are now isn&#8217;t enough.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<p>The convenience store on the way home, the message you still haven&#8217;t answered \u2014 these cues don&#8217;t change just because you&#8217;ve decided to.<\/p>\n<h3 id=\"nh-s7-2\">When is a retreat worth considering?<\/h3>\n<p>If two weeks on your own hasn&#8217;t held, one option is a self-transformation retreat: a few days away from daily life, working with a guide from the level of body and awareness rather than thought.<\/p>\n<p>Some people say that stepping out of their usual triggers made it easier to find time to simply observe their automatic reactions.<\/p>\n<p>But choose the setting carefully. Your yardstick: the organizer&#8217;s background, whether you can decline partway through, fees and cancellation terms, follow-up, and how intense the breathwork is and whether someone stays with you.<\/p>\n<p>We&#8217;ve laid out how to choose in <a href=\"https:\/\/nehan.life\/blog\/jiko-henyo-retreat\/\">How to choose a self-transformation retreat<\/a>.<\/p>\n<h2 id=\"nh-s8\">Is it okay to leave daily life for three days right away? Who shouldn&#8217;t?<\/h2>\n<h3 id=\"nh-s8-1\">What order makes sense?<\/h3>\n<p>Do the three things on your own for two weeks first. If you still slide back, then put a retreat on the list. That sequence puts no strain on anyone.<\/p>\n<p>nehan&#8217;s <a href=\"https:\/\/nehan.life\/soumatou\/\">&#8220;Journey to See Your Life Flash Before You&#8221;<\/a> runs two nights and three days in Kobuchizawa, Yamanashi, followed by fourteen days of integration after you return.<\/p>\n<p>It&#8217;s designed around carrying one single change back into daily life \u2014 not ten.<\/p>\n<h3 id=\"nh-s8-2\">Who should talk to a doctor first?<\/h3>\n<p>If you&#8217;re under medical care, if strong anxiety persists, or if sleepless nights are frequent, speaking with a doctor or qualified professional first is the safer route.<\/p>\n<p>One last thing. Low self-esteem isn&#8217;t a defect. For people raised on conditional approval, it&#8217;s a common road. The chair was always there. You can read what participants have said in <a href=\"https:\/\/nehan.life\/stories\/\">Stories<\/a>, and check what the program involves \u2014 and whether it suits you \u2014 at an <a href=\"https:\/\/nehan.life\/soumatou\/\">orientation session<\/a>.<\/p>\n<h2 id=\"nh-s9\">FAQ<\/h2>\n<p><strong>Q: Is low self-esteem something you&#8217;re born with?<\/strong> A: It&#8217;s generally understood not to be innate, but to build up through repeated experiences of conditional approval. A foundation can be built later.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Q: How long does it take to raise self-esteem?<\/strong> A: It isn&#8217;t measured in days. Start with two weeks of writing down, resting, and trying small things, and watch for changes in your shoulders and your breathing.<\/p>\n<p>This article is general information, not medical advice. Results vary from person to person. If you have concerns about your health, please consult a professional.<\/p>\n<div class=\"nh-cta\">\n<p class=\"nh-cta__eyebrow\">FREE PROGRAM<\/p>\n<p class=\"nh-cta__title\">A doorway to seeing your life anew \u2014 through the body<\/p>\n<p class=\"nh-cta__lead\">Add us on LINE to receive the free online lessons \u2014 the parts we couldn&#8217;t fit into this article.<\/p>\n<div class=\"nh-cta__rule\"><\/div>\n<p>  <a class=\"nh-cta__btn\" href=\"https:\/\/om.nehan.life\/line\/open\/XOyz4TM3QCnV\" style=\"color:#fff !important;text-decoration:none\"><span class=\"label\" style=\"color:#fff !important\">Get the free lessons on LINE<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n<p class=\"nh-cta__note\">Free to join, unsubscribe anytime. This is not medical treatment; results vary by individual.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<div class=\"nh-refs\">\n<h2 id=\"nh-s10\">Sources \/ References<\/h2>\n<ul class=\"nh-check\">\n<li>Rosenberg, M. (1965). Society and the Adolescent Self-Image. Princeton University Press. (Self-Esteem Scale)<\/li>\n<li>Neff, K. D. (2003). Self-compassion: An alternative conceptualization of a healthy attitude toward oneself. Self and Identity.<\/li>\n<li>Cabinet Office of Japan, &#8220;Survey on the Attitudes of Youth in Japan and Other Countries&#8221; (fiscal 2018) https:\/\/www8.cao.go.jp\/youth\/kenkyu\/ishiki\/h30\/pdf-index.html<\/li>\n<li>Wood, J. V. et al. (2009). Positive self-statements: Power for some, peril for others. Psychological Science.<\/li>\n<li>nehan official, &#8220;Journey to See Your Life Flash Before You&#8221; (\/soumatou\/)<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<p><script type=\"application\/ld+json\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@type\":\"FAQPage\",\"mainEntity\":[{\"@type\":\"Question\",\"name\":\"Is low self-esteem something you're born with?\",\"acceptedAnswer\":{\"@type\":\"Answer\",\"text\":\"It's generally understood not to be innate, but to build up through repeated experiences of conditional approval. A foundation can be built later.\"}},{\"@type\":\"Question\",\"name\":\"How long does it take to raise self-esteem?\",\"acceptedAnswer\":{\"@type\":\"Answer\",\"text\":\"It isn't measured in days. Start with two weeks of writing down, resting, and trying small things, and watch for changes in your shoulders and your breathing.\"}}]}<\/script><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"Self-esteem isn't a score. It's the sense that there is a seat for you even on the days nothing goes right. Low self-esteem is rarely a character flaw; more often it's a habit learned from conditional approval. Here are three things to try before anything else, what the research says about affirmations, and how to choose between doing it alone, working with a professional, or joining a program.","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":1721,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_uf_show_specific_survey":0,"_uf_disable_surveys":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[26],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1722","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-self-transformation"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/nehan.life\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1722","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/nehan.life\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/nehan.life\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nehan.life\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nehan.life\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1722"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/nehan.life\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1722\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1730,"href":"https:\/\/nehan.life\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1722\/revisions\/1730"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nehan.life\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/1721"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/nehan.life\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1722"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nehan.life\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1722"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nehan.life\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1722"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}